phobias. and other news. UPDATED

Whew, life has been busy lately. I don't even know what I've been busy with, but I feel like I haven't had time for much of anything! Wait, I know what I've been busy with. School. And work. And couponing...

Have I mentioned that my sister is the queen of bargain shopping? Well, she taught me some of her tricks. So I've been printing coupons, scouring the internet for sales, and shopping like a crazy woman. And paying barely anything. I love Rite Aid. I've bought probably $100 + worth of items there in the last few weeks but have only paid like $20ish dollars for it all. Lovely. Now I'm running out of room to store my stockpile of toiletries, medicine, etc. Anyway, if you want to learn the secrets, check out the Krazy Coupon Lady, Frugal Living NW and Hip2Save, some of my new favorite websites.

I've also been doing more cooking, although not as much as I had been doing. But with my new bargain shopping tricks, maybe I'll be able to afford to buy a whole ton of food now so I can cook my little heart out. But along with cooking came the realization that I have some really weird, irrational fears. Just because I'm weird like that, I decided I would share them. The first two have to do with food. The rest are just craziness.

1.) I have a fear of onions. I am slowly conquering this fear, in fact I have even bought onions and used them recently. But I can only make myself buy the sweet onions and have to wrap leftover onions in a ziplock bag inside of a tupperware container before putting it in the fridge, for fear that it will contaminate everything else inside the fridge with oniony grossness.

2.) I am terrified that I will give myself food poisoning. Or salmonella or some other form of food-borne illness. For this reason, I wash my hands about a million times each time I cook. And I don't taste much while I am cooking because I'm afraid of...something. I don't even know. So that leads to sometimes under-seasoned dishes. But that's (almost) always fixable. I'd rather have under-salted macaroni (as was the case with yesterday's dish) than food poisoning.

3.) Ants. I hate them. More than any other insect. I know they are tiny, I know they are practically harmless. I also know that they infest my living space in droves and are impossible to get rid of. My roommate found ants inside her cereal a while back. So I bought some ant trap things that are supposed to kill them. Well, they are still around. Not as many as I used to get in my CA apartment (where I would call my parents crying, asking how to get rid of them), but enough to be gross. Sometimes I'll be sitting on the couch studying and find an ant crawling on my hand. Or I will be sitting in class and find ants on my notebook. Or there will be a little parade of them in the kitchen. I hate them. It makes me want to scream. I might have to buy some Raid and go on a killing spree soon...

(I was going to put a picture of ants on here. But I threw up a little when the Google images page came up with thousands of pictures of ants, so I quickly closed it. You know what they look like. If not, come on over to my apartment and I'll gladly let you take some home with you.)

4.) I don't know how my siblings and I have made it our entire lives without ever getting lice. But I am terrified of getting them. Maybe I should rethink wanting to be a teacher...Every time I have to itch my scalp I'm certain that lice are the culprit of the itchyness. And every time I go to the hair salon, I'm afraid they'll be like, uhhh, I'm not going to cut your hair, you have lice. How weird is that?! I know, but I'm still so scared. Probably, if I had had lice before, I wouldn't be as scared because I'd know what to expect. Or maybe I'd be more scared. Don't tell me the answer to that if you have had lice. Also, stay away from me if so. Maybe you still have them and will infect me.

(I didn't even try a Google search of lice. Grossss.)

5.) Now, the previous 4 things are pretty weird. But this one just comes out of nowhere. I have a fear of certain bodies of water. I love the ocean. LOVE it. I will swim all around all day in it, doesn't bother me a bit. But when the body of water has gross plants growing in it, and the bottom is all slimy, and the sea-plants brush up against you, I will FREAK OUT (I get the heebie-jeebies just writing about this). So most lakes and rivers are just out of bounds for me as far as swimming goes. And boating is fine, as long as I'm in the boat. But if the boat starts veering towards the gross plant-ness on the banks, I will start secretly freaking out a little, being just sure that I'm going to fly out of the boat and land in the marshy area and THEN WHAT WILL I DO?!?!?! That may sound like a (somewhat) reasonable fear. But I should mention this also applies when I am in a car. If I am driving by a body of water, and there is no guardrail (or even if there is) and very little land in between my car and the water, I get all nervous. I grip the steering wheel with both hands, palms sweaty, and I can't look at the water or I will probably drive right into it. Or that's what my mind thinks anyway. I have to look straight ahead-but even then, I have terrible images in my head of driving into the murky, gross water, and having to either stay trapped in my car or somehow get out of the car and swim through grossness. Although even if the water doesn't appear that gross, I still prefer to not drive by it as I'm afraid I'll drive in and drown. I don't have any idea where this comes from. Just don't try to talk to me while I'm driving by water. I might freak out and accidentally drive us both into the water and we'll drown in the murky depths. Please don't make this happen.

Ay, yi, yi this gives me nightmares just looking at it!

(On a side note, I really am a good driver. I don't know why I doubt my driving abilities so much that I worry about driving into water. I guess that's where the "irrational" in "irrational fears" comes from. Don't judge me.)



UPDATE: I have recently realized some more phobias. Here you go, just for your enjoyment:

6.) Revolving doors. I don't know what it is. I have a little panic attack every time I have to go in one. The airport, the library at PSU, other random places where they have revolving doors. Why would they put those in anywhere?! Why not just an automatic door?! I am always afraid I am either going to get caught in door while it is revolving. Or I will walk too slow or too fast and get hit by the door. Or something. I don't even know what. But I always feel like that scene in Elf when Buddy is trying to get on the escalator. So scared. Trying to drum up the courage. Just going for it. Fortunately I haven't got stuck or had to do the splits while getting in a revolving door. I'm just waiting for when it happens though. Then I'll feel like Ron Burgundy in Anchorman when he is in the phone booth. Stuck in a glass case of emotion. (I don't know why these movie scenes are in my head. But they seem appropriate).

7.) Bicycles. Oh how I hate them. It has been a few years since I've been on a bike. My mom tried to re-teach my sister and I how to ride a bike a few years ago. We also all tried to learn to rollerblade. We went to the same park where we originally learned to ride bikes and rode around in circles and that was enough for me. I don't know what it is, but it just terrifies me. I just feel certain that I am going to fall off. Or run into a car. Or a tree. Or something horrific like that. I prefer my own two feet, where its not all wobbly. (Usually.) Its been probably fifteen years since I actually rode a bike-like, went on a bike ride. I didn't much like it then, and it never grew on me. Soooo I have avoided bikes since then. Don't try to talk me into a bike ride. Unless you have a grown-up sized tricycle. Then I might think about it.